Weekend Retreat

Welcome to the weekend; to the end of January; and to the start of February!! I hope you all have been doing well. I have gotten a lot of great feedback about the posts, especially Weekend Retreat. Thank you :)

I love telling people about available resources. Just as much as I love having things to do over the weekend that coincide with my recovery process.  A few months ago, I stumbled upon one of the most heart warming films that I have ever seen and I was pleasantly surprised that it starred one of my favorite actors, Bruce Willis. The film is called Disney's The Kid.

In the flick, Bruce's 40-year-old character is brought face to face with his younger self. He learns a valuable lesson from his childhood, that I think we all could benefit from; we are never too old to heal old wounds.

In recovery, healing our 'inner child' is often talked about subject. The work involves looking at the painful past; identifying what really happened; identifying the feelings we had way back then; and then look how it impacts us in the present. I cried while watching so you may want to have your Kleenex handy!

The other option you have for this week is to read Codependent No More: How to Stop Controlling Others and Start Caring for Yourself by Melody Beattie. Most people in recovery circles have read this eye opening book on codependence. Melody has been providing readers tons of information on the topic for decades. Her books have sold millions! You may even read her daily affirmations that can be found online or in several books. To find out more about Melody check out her website.

Whatever you decide to do this weekend, remember to love yourself!


Sincerely,

Weekend Retreat

I began my recovery journey with the help of all the books by Pia Mellody. She is an expert on codependence, addiction, and recovery. In her book, The Intimacy Factor, Pia gives readers insight into dealing with relationships: what makes them and what breaks them.

I highly recommend this book if you are looking to understand relationship dynamics. Being in a relationship while in recovery can be very tricky if you don't have an understanding of the basics: boundaries, communication, expectations, and respect. Don't go it alone. Give this book a good read and take notes. My copy is highlighted. :)


In 2013, I saw one of the best movies on addiction, "Thanks for sharing". It is a phenomenal movie starring Hollywood heavy weights, Mark Ruffalo, Gwyneth Paltrow, and Tim Robbins. The movie shares the emotional and psychological ups and downs of several folks in recovery for sex addiction.

It shows how individuals in recovery groups can find the family that we often don't have before recovery. The movie is fun, funny, compassionate, and endearing. I love all the characters and storylines. Invite some friends over and give it a view!

Whatever you decide to do this week, do something fun, relaxing, and on the path of recovery.

Sincerely,

                                                                                                                               

Topic Tuesday: Codependence

Codependence is a deeply rooted, compulsive behavior that is born out of a less than nurturing or abusive environment in childhood. A child’s emotional development may be stunted due to the lack of nurturance, love, guidance, support, and direction that his/her parents are supposed to impart on the child’s life.

As a result of growing up in this environment, a child develops into an adult who may display some or all of the characteristics outlined below. Codependents:

•         may not be aware of how they feel.
•         tend to fear and/or worry how others may respond to their feelings.
•        are not aware of their needs and wants.
•         have difficulty having fun.
•         judge themselves and/or others harshly.
•         are terrified of being left or abandoned
•         over react to changes over which we do not have any control.
•         are extremely loyal, remaining in harmful situations too long.
•        freely offer advice to others without being asked.

The major characteristics of codependence fall into four categories: control, compliance, low self-esteem, and denial. The fellowship of Codependents Anonymous has a self-evaluation tool. Talk with a therapist or attend a CoDA meeting for a safe place to explore your codependence.

Here is the link to the fellowship of Co-Dependents Anonymous.

Sincerely,

Weekend Retreat

Welcome to the weekend! I hope that your week has been pleasurable. Let's get ready for the weekend by looking at some suggested activities for you to engage in.

Love Sick: One Woman's Journey through Sexual Addiction first got on my radar when I was watching Lifetime TV. The movie was based on the book and I loved it! It starred Sally Pressman from one of my favorite shows, Army Wives, so I was hooked from the moment it came on.

Sue William Silverman provides readers a look at sexual addiction from a woman's point of view. I quickly ordered the book after watching the movie.

Here's what I found on Amazon.com about this book:

This compelling story of recovery takes us through 28 days in an inpatient clinic for female sex addicts. Silverman explores the psychology of addiction on a deeply personal level, sharing her struggles with self-destructive tendencies and her desperate desire to be loved, no matter what the cost. Molested repeatedly by her father during her childhood, she realizes the connection between her sexual abuse and her desire to be loved by dangerous, inaccessible men. She finds she must come to terms with anger at her mother, who refused to recognize the sexual abuse of her daughters and intervene on their behalf. Candid, emotionally raw, often frightening, Silverman's account is never sugarcoated, and there are no happy platitudes or breezy success stories in it. It is deeply moving, however, and should inspire anyone going through a 12-step program, whether for sexual addiction or other conditions, and help addicts' friends and family members understand the journey their loved ones must travel in order to heal. Bonnie Johnston
Copyright © American Library Association. All rights reserved --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.